Jill and I were talking about The Undesirables Purge in 2020 and Jill confessed that she had doubts that they were able to purge all the gay people. Even with the government paying vigilante hunters, there had to be a few who were able to slip through the cracks.
I asked her if she believed you could be straight and still fantasize about being with a woman.
Jill nods, "your the best friend I ever had, Whitney, and I think you're beautiful."
I smiled at her sweetness, "thank you. you're beautiful too."
Jill looked down in heavy contemplation for a moment and then told me solemnly, "you don't think you are, but you are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen."
I looked down, the words touched me, they felt silky, sultry, and having these feelings filled me with shame. Jill looks uncomfortable, Whitney bites her lip regretting her words and switched her tone to light and cheery, "and I'm sure the perfect man will come along for you any day now."
"Have you ever seen lesbian porn on the dark web?"
Whitney's eyes go wide, "well, it's illegal to watch lesbian porn. You could be immediately purged."
"Oh I know.. I was just asking,"
"Yes, I look at lesbian porn. I have to think lots of women do."
"Oh thank God.. I thought I was the only one."
"I kissed a girl when I was in college"
Jill's eyes went wide in disbelief, "Nooo!"
I confessed, "We were at a nightclub, dancing together, she pulled me down we kissed. As soon as someone saw, we ran, I lost track of her, we ran in different directions. But that's how I know there were some who were able to slip through The Purge"
Jill leaned forward in interest, "so she kissed you? A real kiss?
"A French kiss," and I dared to tell her more, "and it was hot, desperately passionate, aggressive, and the most erotic experience of my life"
Jill swallows, she folds her legs. I watch her every move, willing her to kiss me, instead she gushes "this is so exciting, but so bad.. we could both go to jail for this conversation."
"So when you watch lesbian porn, do you imagine one of the women is you?"
She shakes her head no and looks me in the eyes, "Yes"
"This question embarrasses you."
"No, I'll confess. You inspire me to be brave. I want to confess I dream of kissing a girl. I fantasize about making love to a girl… I want to make love to you."
The tension in the air was so thick. I bit my lip and nearly pierced the skin. I will tell her. I will tell her. I try to find the courage. I must try to make my dreams come true, no matter if it means being found out.
"I promise I won't tell." "I know you won't. You want it too." Jill gives a sexy smile, she leans forward and I smell her vanilla lotion. Her blue eyes look into mine, and the freckles of light inside of them look like mirror images. I feel myself pull to her, drawn as if there is a magnetic force between us, pushing us closer, closer, until her lips touch mine. My eyes are wide open, I see the freckles of light in our eyes, perfectly aligned. She kisses me deeper, she closes her eyes, she breathes in, I pull her on top of me. I want to be one with her, and there is fear, but there is no control when it comes to our love. I must have her.
Watch the story unfold..